Thursday, August 12, 2010

I'm Not In Control

Friday night sunset
I'm not in control.  I mean, I believe in free will and that I can make choices about my life, but ultimately, I am not in control.  I don't see the big picture.  I don't understand how the things happening today will benefit me six months from now.  I can't work together my past, my present, and my future into one beautiful picture.  I am at a loss as a human in this area.

Today, Mike was laid off from his job.  It was nothing personal.  The company he has worked for these last four years has been experiencing some financial difficulty (as many places are in this fragile economy), and they decided to stop all movie production and focus solely on marketing the films they already have.  Mike and four other "creatives" on the production team were let go as a result.  We have had an inkling that things were not good for awhile now, but today it became official. 

You know what is funny, though?  We are OK!  We both have a deep inner peace about the whole situation, and would even go so far as to say that we are excited about it.  Because we believe in a God who works ALL things together for good (Romans 8:28).  Looking back over our eleven year marriage, He has provided for us every step of the way-- even when we thought there was no way.  Each time He provided for us has served as a spiritual marker to help us keep the faith on our present journey.  Why would He abandon us now? 

Instead, we feel like we are about to embark on a new chapter in our lives.  We might be stretched along the way, but we are excited about where we are going and what is around the corner for us.  I am so thankful for a husband who is a hard worker. I'm thankful for our three healthy children.  I'm thankful that we have enough for right now.  And I trust God with all of our tomorrows. 

Just looking at this sky is so calming to me. We are going to be alright!

And now this Old Lady can take a break as Mike's work transportation.  I can hear her breathing a sigh of relief right now.


Jenn said...

Amazing stuff, sweet girl! Oh how many times I have echoed these same thoughts. You want to worry but then you realize, what's the point? He has provided and will continue to provide - why would He stop now!So I pray for perfect timing and perfect peace in what will come next for you all...I know it will be good!

Mocha Mama 24 said...

Thankfully your husband is also very talented as well. I will be praying for you guys!

affectioknit said...

Bless you!